I hope everyone had a splendid holiday and New Year. As for me and my family, we just chilled, played games, and watched movies. It was an ideal way to spend my time off. Unfortunately, the good news ends there.
My teacher is gone. Yep, the one I barely even knew, gone. I’ve come to understand after years of dancing that as far as transient jobs go, franchise instructor probably tops them all. Most dancers see it as a stepping stone for a better job. How odd that I see it as my dream job, not a transition but an end itself! I hope and pray that I am not the only one that sees thus… So, here’s a timeline,
which I’m also writing to help myself catch up and recuperate:
mid-July — Tommy leaves after being my instructor for three years. I’m at the peak of my dancing, particularly working on my Viennese amalgamation and preparing for my first studio show with him. I don’t know why he leaves, save for what Eddie tells me. He says he won’t let Tommy back to the studio until he resolves his “personal issues.” Though if I may be perfectly frank, I’m not sure he’d be let in again, which is already making the huge assumption that he would come back. I know from the get-go that I need to move on.
roughly five months later — After switching between Eddie and Olga for the duration of this gap, Cole arrives and things finally start to look better. He strikes me as both laid back and energetic with a love of teaching technique. I’m eager to know him better as his student.
Last night — I have two lessons scheduled with Cole, one for this week and one for the Christmas holiday. (He had he asked me if I wanted to dance over the break. I told him that I preferred to wait until after the New Year.) On Monday, he isn’t present at the studio, and I get naturally suspicious *’high turnover alarm’ sounds inside my head* Turns out, he has a family emergency because his grandmother fell ill. No lessons for Monday, but Eddie tells me that either he or Cole will contact me to see what they could work out. I get no calls and don’t go to classes until Thursday. It may be time for the weekly studio practice party, but I need answers. I ask Eddie if Cole is okay, and Eddie says he isn’t. I assume his grandmother has died and wonder deep down whether he’ll come back to the studio or not. I press slightly harder. “His grandmother is fine,” he tells me.
“So, is he sick?” I ask, delaying the answer I already know.
“No,” Eddie replies.
“So, when is he coming back?” at this point I’m just trying to stay afloat and am very desperate.
“He’s not coming back,” Eddie answers.
“He’s not coming back?” I ask for “clarification.”
“No, he’s definitely not coming back.” Eddie says.
(*Sigh* It’s kind of pathetic to write this little transcript out. Our conversation was like that repetitive, back-and-forth Sandford Meisner exercise for actors! I know my reaction isn’t extraordinary, and it’s not like I began to cry in front of him—the crying began after I’d gone home.)
I don’t want to write much more because I need to give myself some time to breathe and let go. I know it’s a business, first and foremost. I know people who lead businesses have to make tough choices, and respect both their employees and customers. I know I’m back to shuffling between Eddie and Olga, though it’s better than having no teacher at all. Finally, I know I’m done writing. I’ll see you guys when I’ve rested more.
Tiredly but lovingly,