Bringing the Inner Flirt Out


photo by Dazzie D (flickr)

I’m sorry that this post is late, but midterms have kept me very busy.  Here’s a brief update about my private lessons: I’ll be testing out of Bronze II on the 30th of this month.  It’s been a while since my last test, so I’m kind of nervous.  Tango worries me most.  I definitely need to ask Tommy to go over the two figures for it (again).

I feel kind of silly writing this, but I really think dancing is helping me learn how to flirt.  There, I said it.  I think flirting is like any skill.  Some people are naturally talented, and others, not so much.  I fall into the second category.  I can be quite shy when it comes to talking to a guy that’s caught my eye.  It’s almost painful.  I know the source of the pain comes from the fear of being vulnerable.  “What if he doesn’t reciprocate?” I ask.  Yeah, taking risks is where the most magic happens and all that jazz, but I’ve actually really struggled with this.  However, I see a good portion of interacting with your dance partner as acting.  Practicing being flirty while dancing helps get rid of the nervousness because of that perspective.  I’m hoping that if I can nail this in dance, I can apply it off the floor.  Of course, most of my practice comes from my Rhythm dances.  Here are some examples of things I’m learning:

  • breaking the touch barrier (Ballroom involves a lot of physical contact.)
  • using appropriate facial expressions in the right situation
  • inviting body language
  • holding yourself upright, which can express confidence
  • Smiling (I actually don’t smile too much as I want to when I dance because I’m concentrating.  Tommy calls me out about this often.)
  • using suggestive gestures, like running my hand across my neck and showing it off

So, have any of y’all got any tips for bringing out my?  I may be what my mother and I jokingly call a “manly woman”, but I still desire a relationship.  Sometimes I really wonder what it would be like to hold a guy’s hand or, perhaps to snuggle with him…  In the meantime, my dance journey will continue.  It’s surprising how much it parallels with my life.

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One thought on “Bringing the Inner Flirt Out

  1. Love the post. I re-began my love for dancing this summer, mainly Ceroc (fusion of salsa and jive) and salsa. Ceroc especially has helped me flirting wise by improving my confidence. If you also dance socially it’s great when you know you’re good and guys ask you to dance. You get better at eye contact and speaking to men. So far that’s been my experience. And I do agree with smiling. I thnk that’s the biggest factor. Smiling and having eye contact will win anyone over.

The floor is yours now.

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