The Benefits of an Unwilling Vacation


What an odd title I’ve thought up.  You know, I never thought I’d use the words unwilling and vacation in the same sentence.  Heck, finals have just ended for me, so this college kid is officially on summer vacation.  Woohoo!  Speak of the devil, I’ll be taking a family vacation out-of-town in about three weeks.  Sadly, that means no blogging.  I just wanted to give you all the heads up when I suddenly disappear from cyberspace.

The unwilling part I’m referring to is my current hiatus from ballroom.  You know, while I was still dancing, I often wondered how I would ever exist should the dancing ever stop.  *over-dramatic gasp*.  Turns out, I’m existing quite well, thank you for asking.  So, in the interest of (or in desperation) of looking at the “bright side”, I’ve compiled a list of the benefits of not having ballroom in my life currently.

1) Focusing on Ballet

Hey, who wouldn’t want to wake up at 7:30 am in the morning to practice a form of dance that makes you feel literally like a fish out of water?  I do!  It’s gotta be the endorphins and feeling of being hard-core.  After all, I feel so athletic constantly wobbling around on the balls of my feet wondering if I’ll ever get better.  And, I even did it before math class (my worst subject) when school was still in session.  Boom!  Hello, hard-core!

2) Focusing on my Poetry

This hobby has been on and off for the past couple of years, but it’s certainly here to stay now.  So, since I’m not dancing, I get to indulge in my Jane Austen-esque, sickly romantic side.  What could be better than writing poetry that God knows you’re not going to let anybody read until you’re already dead so you won’t die of embarrassment at the fluff you’ve managed to vomit on some pieces of paper?  Ah, nothing like the satisfaction of caring on the noble tradition of the classical Greeks and Romans, eh?

3) Focusing on those Guys

What better way to spend your unwilling free time than by dwelling on Bobby McHandsome’s chiseled face?  He makes you blush, gives you butterflies, but also unintentionally bruises your fragile little heart due to unrequited “love.”  After all, you’ve only known the guy for a year, how could you not be in love?  *snorts*  Here’s a plus: you’re really loud, and he’s really reserved.  You also think you may scare him sometimes with your boundless energy.  Can you say soul mates?

4) Blogging (or any other form of social media)

A wise individual once said this when he was defining blogging, “Never has so little been said by so many.”  Yep, when real friends are absent, you can always turn to the warm arms of the virtual community.  They totally (or should I say totes) understand your currently dilemma.  Come on, spill the beans!  It’s not like everyone can read it.

5) Family

Nothing says family like the soothing sounds of a hammer and all sorts of building material being shuffled around the house as it’s being renovated.  Want to talk to Mom?  Oh wait, she’s busy talking to the tile guy.  Hey, at least she’s here in your presence.  She wasn’t when you were off dancing.  And what thing says family more than the consecutive days of eating fast-food for breakfast out on the patio?  Yum!

__

Mandatory Authoress’ Note: This is satire.  I repeat, this is satire.  I felt the need to elucidate this as I’ve come across way too many adverse reactions to satirical pieces.  No, I haven’t suddenly become cynical.  And yes, with the possible exception of #3, all of these things have complemented my ballroom-less existence quite nicely, and I am grateful for them.  I may not be a teenager anymore (I just turned twenty on the 19th of April), but that doesn’t mean I’m still not fully fluent in the language of sarcasm.  Well, I felt pretty darn sarcastic today, so I decided to try my hand at satire.  I feel pretty confident about it, but I’m no Johnathan Swift.  Want to read real satire?  Click here.  I love this piece.  Sadly, when I first read it in 10th grade, some of my unfortunate classmates actually took the piece seriously.

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