All right, my 25th post! Let’s make this a funny one, eh? Much to my delight, I’ve found that most of my teachers are just little kids at heart. Since I try to maintain that spirit, we all get along quite well. Sure, we spend most of our time dancing, but we intermingle that with a liberal dose of immaturity and humor.
Highways: The Urban Labyrinth
Let me preface this by saying that I’m not exactly proud of my sense of direction. It’s not horrendous or anything, but it takes a lot of repetition for me to memorize how to get to places. I was leaving the dance studio a couple of months ago, and my main route was blocked by construction. Long story short, I wound up lost on a main highway, and it took me three whole hours to get back home. By the time I pulled in, I saw a police car, and my frantic parents rushed in to embrace me. Turns out the people at the dance studio got worried sick, too, and texted with my parents as a way of comforting each other. That was the first time I got lost since I acquired my driver’s license. Of course, it wasn’t particularly funny at the time, but now DP teases me about it.
After a lesson shortly following the fiasco…
I was chilling in the water cooler room chatting with a teacher when DP comes in with the dancing form I have to initial after every lesson.
DP: This is a form saying that you won’t leave the studio without an escort.
Me: *lightly slaps him with embarrassed smile*
Me: *pantomimes jabbing him with a pen*
DP: Hey, do you need any quarters?
Me: No, why?
DP: You know, for the pay phone. In case you get lost on the way home.
Me: You’re a jerk! How long ago was that?
DP: *still giggling, but gives me an “I’m sorry” hug*
In the same vein, my former dance teacher, Victor, once got lost on a stretch of highway. This was when he first moved to America, and he couldn’t speak English. He had a weekend habit of going to the movies, but he got lost on this go-around. Victor, bless his heart, didn’t make it home until about 3:00 am. I heard this story second-hand from his wife. Apparently this was before they met. She was smiling slightly as she told this. Odd how bad experiences can become funny over time.
Ever-eternal Potty Humor
Remember those days as a little kid? Bodily functions were just so funny. Apparently DP, who is an adorable little kid at heart, decided to revert to his five-year old self. He was teaching me a Bronze II Waltz figure.
Me: I’m a bit confused is it like number one *does movement* or number two *does different movement*.
DP: Number two. *does proper movement with me*. And you know, when I mean number two, I mean your dance movement. *Voice becomes very smooth* That’s right, Alaina. Feel the number two…
DP: *feigned exasperation* Alaina! You know what I mean!
Me: Hey, you started it! 😀
Salsa and Babies
A word of warning, this is going into the PG-13 category. If you are super-sensitive, I suggest you skip this one. I was in a Salsa group class alone, and the studio’s newest teacher gave me an analogy for maintaining movement in your lower body, but not your upper body.
Teacher: So I want you to pretend that you have two babies in your hand.
Teacher: You can’t shake your upper body because if you do, the babies will get shaken and die.
Me: 😮 *shocked laugh* What?! Where in the world did that analogy come from?
She later asked me to guess who told her that analogy. I guessed correctly. This certain teacher has a reputation for making all sorts of weird, funny, and slightly inappropriate analogies regarding technique, but it gets the point across. If you ballroom dance for a while, eventually you’re going to run into one of these, too.
I’d like to end this with a meme I found while I was hanging around Dance Forums. I don’t know why, but I found it hilarious.
Note, “What I really do” is not what I really do. Though, sometimes I do feel as if I’m just dancing and looking like a fool at the same time. My non-dancing friends probably I think I dance the way “Mom” does. Ballroom is so much more, and I love it!